Loneliness Can Get Out of the Park

God why do we feel so lonely? I know you are with me I see you in the everyday. You laugh with me, you shop with me, we smile, we talk, we sing, we play with the cats and high five. But lonely still sits in.

It’s a creepy little man in the corner of my mind. He sits on the bleachers of life with me just a few seats down. I can see him out of the corner of my eye.  I can hear him saying, “no one really loves you, you are not good enough, you screw everything up, you are just too weird for everyone, you are too needy, you don’t know enough. You’re stuck with me and I don’t like you either.” I ignore him, but he taunts me. God you sit be between me and the creepy Loneliness. You and I enjoy our hot dogs, we cheer when something good happens and we groan at the bad. I hear the Loneliness over the life that is going on around me. You smile, you put your arm around me, you say you are not alone, I am here. I say but God I still feel lonely, my heart hurts, I am lonely. Who will make me laugh? Who will be there when I am scared? When bad things happen who will comfort me? Who will I tell my everyday things? Will you be there? God always is there, I will never leave you or forsake you. And every time I feel Creepy Loneliness look my way I think of you God. You will never leave me or forsake me, you are my my protector, you are my God in whom I trust. You have given me all things good. You have given me my family and my friends. You have given me my imagination and my talents. You care for me and you don’t want us to hurt, you work on hearts and minds and our time is not your time. Thank you for sitting between me and loneliness. Someday I’m going to stick my tongue out at him because this is just for a little while and there will be more of us in my row cheering, laughing and groaning at the things in life. Not so tough now are you loneliness, all you are, are words and thoughts, I’ve never been alone.

Thank you God for always being with me, I know that you haven’t always been proud of what I do, but I know that you think I’m pretty awesome, not because of what I do, but for my heart.
 I love you.

Letter to my God

Thank you God for sending your son to pay the price for us. I will never know the pain went through for me, but it is the greatest love story I have ever known. You loved me so much that you didn’t want to spend eternity without me. I love you, I thank you. I can think of nothing better than running on those streets of gold and a hug, a warmth burning brighter than the sun, a joy, a peace greater than being able to spend forever with you. All have fallen short of the glory of God, we forget that you are a gentleman and you let us live, you hurt with us, you hold us when we are afraid you teach us and you bring us back when we wander off and fall down. I don’t have lifes answers, but you do.  And I put my faith in you. My God Lives! Help me make my life into something pleasing to you. Help me forgive myself and others. Help me see the way I need to go. Guard my lips, my mind and my actions. I want to be a light I want to be loved and cared for by you. I’ve fallen so low by my own ways, I have wandered away and broken down. But you are the good shepherd and you have come after your lost lamb. You pick me up and walk me back,  you calm your little lamb as she kicks and yells. She fights you on the walk back, but hold her tight, she loves you. Help her, she feels safe in your arms. Sing her to sleep, tell her you love her. Your love makes her still, your love heals, your love forgives, your love brings joy. Your love gives life. You are my God, you are my love, I will soak up your light and live in your love. I will be still and let you do your work.

I love you, Amen.